I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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