the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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