I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
