you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize
