brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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