When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
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