:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
