I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
This is my gift to your gina
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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