Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
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