literally had 100 drinks last night.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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