STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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