Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I forgot how hot balto sounded
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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