i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
