he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
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