His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
