Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
