I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
