I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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