She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
