i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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