also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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