I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
