Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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