I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
