Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
