he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
