So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
It's like God shit irony all over that family
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
