Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
