he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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