Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
