Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
