And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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