just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I think I won the penis lottery.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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