We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
