I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
i need some magic done to my vagina
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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