discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Randomize
