Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
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