i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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