Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
