i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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