and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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