Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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