Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
