So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I need a beard to bite.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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