The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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