We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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