God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I just cut my nipple shaving
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Dicks are not precious.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
