ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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