What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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