id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
