It's Friday. Sex?
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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